By Misti B.
Pssssst! Did you know that it’s actually okay to enjoy a good day? Stay with me because, if you’re anything like I was before Al-Anon, good days weren’t really good days, they were the “calm before the storm”—the tremor before the massive earthquake that destroyed everything. Happiness was not something I was accustomed to.
I used to feel there was something virtuous about suffering. It’s like my brain had tricked me into thinking that enjoying my life meant I was being disloyal to the friends or family members who were having problems.
One day, I sat myself down and took a look at those beliefs. Now that’s a pretty silly way to live, I thought. I don’t have to be unhappy just because others are. I’m not being disloyal by having a great life. And my mind replied, Okay, maybe that’s so. But what if you aren’t having a good time and you’re in denial? What then?
I didn’t have a reply at the time, but today here’s what I’d say to myself, should that question come up: It’s okay to have a fantastic day. An amazing day does not have to be met with feelings of guilt or fear. It isn’t necessary to look in the mirror and examine your flaws in order to keep yourself grounded. You don’t have to create problems where there aren’t any.
A stellar day is a gift from God. I no longer have to analyze it; I can even savor it. In fact, I can feel a stellar day coming on right now. It’s either that or a big storm with heavy rain.
I’ll grab my umbrella, just in case.
In spite of myself:
Today I’m going to assume that
the feeling I’m having is a good one.
About the Author
Misti B. writes humorous books about life in recovery, mainly because no one else is writing them – at least from a witty point of view.
Misti’s had a successful career in the entertainment industry, having written and directed for stage and live events. She wrote and directed a film called, “Exposed,” which you’ve probably not seen, but she highly recommends because it “has an excellent cast!”
All of these experiences – from which she is still recovering – combined with her highly dysfunctional upbringing, provide fodder for her gritty, but inspiring stories.
She likes to quote Mel Brooks, whom she thinks said, “The only difference between comedy and tragedy is time. . .”
About the Book
Most people in the throes of codependency's problematic behaviors typically don't see their plight as a laughing matter. And yet, judging by the peals of laughter often heard coming out of Twelve Step meeting rooms, many eventually do find the humor in their self-defeating thoughts and actions.
If You Leave Me, Can I Come with You? is full of refreshingly original meditations for each day of the year. Infusing her wisdom with self-revealing honesty and humor, Misti B. provides healing insight with a lighthearted touch into the common struggles that codependents and those in Al-Anon frequently face. Issues such as people pleasing, lack of boundaries, and perfectionism don't have to overwhelm us if we work a solid Twelve Step program and learn not to take ourselves so seriously. Misti B. shows how to do both, delivering the right mix of support, inspiration, and healthy irreverence.