David K. went through treatment for substance abuse seven years ago, and has been sober ever since. In recovery, however, he's had to deal with two other compulsive behaviors: compulsive spending and debting.

"After I got sober, I maxed out all my credit cards," David recalled. "I never balanced my checkbook and I bought a lot of stuff I didn't need and couldn't afford. I spent a lot of sleepless nights, worrying about money and how I was going to keep dodging the collection agencies. It took a real toll on my relationships. Eventually, no one in my family trusted me with money, or anything else."

Spending money wisely doesn't come naturally for many of us. Bombarded by slick advertisers who coax us into living beyond our means, it's easy to let our spending habits get out of control. For some folks, this becomes a chronic problem with life-damaging consequences. Compulsive spenders, for example, may incur huge debts, destroy trust in relationships, and live in constant fear of being discovered or punished. They may spend their life savings, lose their homes, or commit crimes to support their spending behavior.

"A well-controlled study found that 6 percent of all Americans are compulsive spenders," said Donna Boundy, author of "When Money is the Drug."

People whose compulsive behaviors center on spending, borrowing or the fear of money come from all walks of life. They also share some characteristics with chemically dependent people. "Usually, compulsive spenders or debtors come from families where there was a real sense of emotional deprivation, abuse or neglect," Boundy said. "There may have been a chronic illness, addictions, or other stresses. When they come from that kind of family, it often shows up in their relationship with money."

The compulsive spender spends money to get a high, Boundy said. "It's like gambling in many ways. Shopping allows you to escape from your real life. You are bombarded with sensory stimulation and your fantasy life is given full expression. You can imagine that your life will be better with that new pair of boots or that living room set. Spending can serve as an antidepressant for some people."

When the compulsive spender finishes a shopping binge, however, he or she frequently is overwhelmed with feelings of guilt or shame. "The feeling is, 'I've done it again. That money was supposed to pay for the kids' camp or school tuition,'" Boundy said. "The person is determined not to do it again and there's a period of control. But then the stress builds up and off they go again."

Twelve Step groups such as Debtors Anonymous (DA) provide help and support for people with money disorders. At these groups, people find a safe place to share their stories. The group helps people start taking responsibility for their financial affairs and slowly get their money life back on track. According to DA literature, compulsive debting is caused by a person's unwillingness to accept present realities and responsibilities, emotional insecurity and immaturity, a strong inner urge to be a "big shot," and the fear of prosperity.

The quality of David's life has dramatically improved since he started attending DA meetings. "Through DA and psychotherapy, I learned how my family background affected my spending habits. I didn't get touches or hugs when I was growing up, I'd get money. I never really grew up, I always felt that someone would bail me out if I got into serious financial trouble, so I didn't have to worry about my debt.

"In DA, I've learned to take responsibility for my own finances," he continued. "My debt has stabilized and is slowly being reduced. I no longer use credit cards. I no longer take out any unsecured debt. Seeing that I wasn't alone reduced my shame and gave me the hope I needed to turn my money life around."

Some helpful support groups for compulsive spenders and debtors are available. Call Debtors Anonymous World Services in Needham, Mass., at (781) 453-2743 to learn about the DA group closest to you. Spenders Anonymous groups may also be in your area.

--Published November 23, 1998