"And then when I found LSD-acid--that was my drug of choice. Now that was the real thing!"

"Getting high on marijuana was the greatest thing. I loved it from the very first instant."

"I thought, 'Boy, if I could stay in this hospital bed the rest of my life, push this button, and get this Demerol, I'd be satisfied.'"

"I always walked around with ten quaaludes jiggling around in my pocket and felt this feeling of power."

These statements come from five different people featured in a new Hazelden video, Pathways to NA. Each person used a different drug or combination of drugs. Yet two things unite them: powerlessness over addiction and the goal to stay sober just for today in Narcotics Anonymous (NA).

NA is a nonprofit, mutual-help organization founded in 1953 and created in the spirit of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). From its first meetings in southern California, NA spread across the United States. It grew slowly and erratically during its first two decades until members formed a World Service Office in Los Angeles in 1972. Since then, membership has grown immensely. In 1982, there were about 2,000 NA groups. Today, more than 300,000 members from 15,000 groups meet in the United States, Canada and 41 other countries.

People who know AA will find many familiar features in NA. Members of NA hold closed meetings for addicts and open meetings for other interested people. NA meetings follow a variety of formats, some centering on speakers and others on discussions of NA literature. There is no charge for NA meetings, though members make goodwill offerings. NA encourages each newcomer to find a sponsor, an experienced NA member who acts as a mentor in recovery. And though NA meetings proceed with little formal structure, there is a bottom line: No drugs or paraphernalia allowed.

Unity in diversity
NA's present popularity came with some growing pains. This is hardly surprising for a group that is open to anyone addicted to any drug. At an NA meeting, people who once took amphetamines, LSD or Valium may sit next to marijuana or cocaine addicts.

One of the first challenges faced by NA's founders was how to find unity in such diversity. Their ingenious solution came with help from AA's founders.

Before NA began, AA was in turmoil over how to treat people addicted to drugs other than alcohol. A key factor in AA's strength has been its single-minded focus on doing one thing and doing it well--carrying the message of recovery to alcoholics. Bill W., AA's cofounder, often spoke of the "atmosphere of identification" needed for alcoholics to enter recovery. In plain English, this means that one drunk can empathize with another in a way that no other person can.

When addicts began knocking on AA's doors, some feared that this atmosphere of identification would be weakened. The dilemma put lives at stake. On the one hand, many types of addicts begged for admission into AA meetings. On the other hand, AA's Step One called for members to admit their powerlessness over a single drug--alcohol. Rewording that step to include every conceivable kind of drug was impractical. Yet, turning dying addicts back out into the streets was no solution either.

What emerged was a choice that balanced tradition and compassion. AA's founders decided to freely offer their Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions to any group that wished to use them. At the same time, AA pledged a spirit of "cooperation but not affiliation'' with such groups. The decision was a true "win-win." People in AA could continue to identify with fellow alcoholics. And other addicts could adapt AA's program of recovery for their own use.

NA quickly took the cue. One of its first decisions was to change a single word in Step One. Instead of powerlessness over alcohol, NA's founders called on its members to admit powerlessness over addiction. Their reasoning was this: What addicts have in common is no single drug of choice but a physical craving and mental obsession for mood-altering substances.

Here NA found a parallel to the history of AA. One of Bill W.'s greatest contributions to AA was his early addition of the phrase, "God as we understood Him," to Steps Three and Eleven. He later referred to this wording as the "tenstrike" of AA, a simple move that helped free the fellowship from religious controversy. NA accomplished a similar feat by changing alcohol to addiction. With one turn of a phrase, NA offered unity to its members and put them on the same road to recovery.

Stereotypes linger
Members of NA still struggle with stereotypes, something experienced by nearly all recovering people, but especially felt by nonalcoholic addicts. "NA is not dominated by dope-shooting criminals and burly, tattooed bikers," notes John, an NA member. "However, we are still a generation or more away from attracting and holding large numbers of mainstream professionals."

As a counselor in Hazelden's Tiebout Unit, Keith Jensen acknowledges that NA "draws some of the people who feel a little bit more disenfranchised from society." He praises NA for an open-door policy that welcomes people addicted to any drug, including alcohol. "Most NA meetings are pretty open-minded in terms of admitting anybody who wants to quit using," says Jensen.

AA is more rigid about its participants. Official AA policy states that drug addicts are welcome at open AA meetings, but not at closed meetings. However, many closed AA groups do accept people "purely on drugs," and addicts cross-addicted to alcohol and another drug are always welcome.

Lee Manchester, communications officer for NA's World Service Office, urges people to look beyond the stereotypes of NA. "NA members run the gamut of whichever community the NA group is in. We ask people to visit an open meeting and see for themselves."

Manchester adds that resistance to referring people to NA has lessened as therapists have become more familiar with the NA program.

Growth opportunities
Last year NA listed several key issues for growth into the twenty-first century. Two areas of concern emerged. One is making NA more effective at a grassroots level, ensuring that existing members carry the NA message to people in their neighborhoods. Second is carrying the message to places where NA is not well known. This entails developing and improving relationships with health care groups, treatment providers and government agencies, so that those groups have good information about NA and NA contacts.

Manchester acknowledges that the 1990s are lean times for chemical dependency treatment. Ironically, this situation grants an opportunity. "It's less difficult to get the NA message out now," says Manchester. "With more limited budgets, government officials and people in civic programs are looking more toward self-supporting, community-based organizations such as NA to fill the gap that used to be met by professional insurance-paid treatment."

As outreach continues, NA's pledge of unity in diversity is likely to remain steadfast. NA has more than 40 years of experience in helping people from every occupation, race and ethnic group identify with each other. Addiction is their shared problem and powerlessness is their common ground. This attitude applies to all substances, including alcohol. NA members believe that alcoholics are simply fellow addicts and thus are welcome at any NA meeting. People who once shot heroin, smoked pot, popped pills, or drank booze can all relate to each other--as long as they focus on the disease of addiction rather than on specific chemicals.

"Addicts have an obsession with drugs that forces them to use against their will," says John. "We have lost our choice to use or not use drugs. We continue to use despite the negative consequences of our addiction. We can cry, promise and swear, but we use again. NA restores our choice, just for today."

For information on meetings in your area, check the NA Web site or look in your local phone directory under Narcotics Anonymous. The postal address of the NA world service office is P.O. Box 9999, Van Nuys, CA 91409, (818) 773-9999, for a list of meetings in the United States and Canada.